Sunday, January 20, 2013

The height of weapons technology

[Originally posted at Ana Mardoll's Ramblings.]
[Ok, so some explanation might be required in terms of context.  You see people were discussing the game of baseball as played by Twilight vampires and that inevitably leads to the question of how one would cut vampire flesh from vampire bones if one were going to make them into baseball bats that might be used when the balls routinely break the sound barrier during pitches with the answer, of course, being vampire teeth.]

"And this is the height of weapons technology."
"It's a wooden sword."
"Yes, it is."
"Wooden swords are very good a killing people, provided that the cutting edge is made of something appropriately sharp, like chipped obsidian, but only unarmed people. The moment they come up against a metal sword they shatter. In fact it is believed that it was the conquistador's metal swords, not their guns, that allowed them to conquer the wooden sword wielding natives."
"This is all true, but don't you want to know what the blade is made out of?"
"Fine. What?"
"Vampire teeth."
"I still say it would be better if you set the teeth into something stronger, like metal or vampire bone."

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[Original, I suppose, or maybe Twilight]

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