Friday, June 22, 2012

Omphalos Workers

[Originally posted at Slacktivist.]
[The Omphalos Hypothesis is that the universe was created with an aged lived in look, sort of like prefaded jeans, and that is why everything looks so old.  Omphalos refers to navel, and the idea was that Adam and Eve had navels even though, created as adults, there would be no need for them.  The newly created earth also had signs of it's non-existent youth.]
[Or course evidence of human habitation before the supposed creation of the earth is an interesting wrinkle in the whole thing.]


Since I like angels, this story begins when an angel walks into a cave, sees another angel, and then this happens:
"Eoniel, what are you doing?"
"I'm painting."
"Why?"
"God said make the place look old."
"The rocks!  He said make the rocks look old. "
"Yeah, and what makes something look older than some aged graffiti?"
"That's not what He meant."
"Says who?"
"Says... listen, what do you think people are going to think when they find these paintings?  They're going to be confused and jump to all the wrong conclusions and ... and you're ruining everything!"
"If you don't like my art you could have  just said so."
"IT'S NOT ABOUT THE STUPID ART!"
(Hurt:) "You think it's stupid?"
"Look, I didn't mean that, I just meant that... don't look at me like that.  No crying, that's an order.  Come on, please." *pause* "They're very nice animals, really, but we shouldn't be making it look like other people were here before the real ones."
"So you think my art is..."
(Trying to sound sincere:) "It's great.  Really nice.  I'm sure God would think so too, but you shouldn't be doing it here.  We don't want to make it seem like humans have already been here."
"Well you should tell Techniel, he's been making spear-points and such."
"Seriously?"
*nods*
*sighs* *facepalms* *composes self* (actually sincere:) "I really do like the horses by the way."
"Thanks!"  *pause* "Oh, you probably want to know that I think some of the others are building ruins to resemble the civilizations from their roleplaying groups."
"Oh for the love of ..."


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